[nfbwatlk] Competing on Terms of Equality

Mary Ellen gabias at telus.net
Fri Mar 13 21:56:12 UTC 2009


I appreciate the discussion the article has generated. I, too, often find
myself being too willing to allow myself to behave like the stereotype of a
nice, but somewhat dependent, blind person. 
For instance, should I pay the cab driver to carry my groceries to the door?
That's the common practice for others who hire a cab to bring groceries
home, but does it send the wrong message? I've begun grabbing the first load
as I get out of the cab. If the driver brings the rest, it's probably
reasonable, since time is money for taxi drivers, and the two of us working
to empty the trunk means that he can get back on the road faster. 
But the larger question remains. When I pay others to do a service for me,
one that I know very well I could do for myself if I wanted to, am I copping
out? I know I could learn to mow my own lawn, but I would find it hard to
think of something I would like to do less! We can spend so much time and
energy demonstrating to ourselves and others that we can do things we find
challenging that we have no time to simply do the things we want to do. We
can also cop out and refuse to try things which are a little scary.
Dr. Jernigan's 1992 speech "The Nature of Independence," goes a long way
toward answering those questions, at least for me. I've decided the best
balance for me is to stretch myself to do something I find a little scary
(or just harder than I'm used to) from time to time. By the way, blindness
isn't the only portion of my life where that philosophy should apply.
Motherhood also stretches me more often than I wish.
I suppose the balance is to try to improve while enjoying my present
capabilities. Failing to attempt to get better leads to stagnation; failing
to enjoy my life as is (with all its successes and imperfections) leads to
misery. I know one thing, though. All of you in the Federation will help
keep me honest and loving it.

-----Original Message-----
From: nfbwatlk-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nfbwatlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Prows, Bennett (HHS/OCR)
Sent: March 12, 2009 8:11 AM
To: NFB of Washington Talk Mailing List
Subject: [nfbwatlk] Competing on Terms of Equality



Mike,

 

This article particularly applies to me anyway.  I am constantly monitoring
my behavior as it relates to others, and often recognizing in advance that
I'm falling short of my own principles and expectations. It's a constant
struggle, and EVALUATION of our FEELINGS ABOUT BLINDNESS, HENCE OUR
confidence in ourselves  WHICH IS important.  No one is perfect, and we
SHOULDN'T  beat ourselves up if we sometimes don't do what we know we can
do.  But, if we keep getting up after falling, dusting ourselves off, and
starting over again to live our philosophy, we and the world we live in will
be much better for it.  I just don't want us to use the excuse that "well,
I'll do better next time" to short change ourselves and/or other blind
people.  In the continuing era of 70 percent unemployment of the blind, I
believe we must continue to strive to demonstrate that we can and will
compete on terms of equality.

 

Thanks for the article.

 

/s/ 

 

Bennett Prows

 

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