[Blindtlk] question

Sun Jun 3 22:57:02 CDT 2007

Corey:

Now you really don't expect us to get in the middle of a husband-wife 
debate, now do you? (grin)

You say the guy has loaned you money. Has he offered to pay your gas 
since? Has he offered other assistance? Has he done some things on his 
own *without* asking you and your wife for transport?

The answers to these questions will go a way toward making a sound 
judgment. All-too-often, blind people come (wittingly or not) to depend 
upon sighted folks and seem relatively unaware of how much they are 
imposing on the sighted "friends".

For me, the bottom line is that if your wife doesn't want to drive him, 
that should be the end of it. He has no right to expect you to take him 
to the theater nor have you an obligation to take him there. If you do 
so out of the goodness of your hearts or as part of a business 
arrangement, well and good. But look at it this way: if he is truly an 
independent blind person, how come he didn't get himself down there? Do 
you hear many sighted persons asking to be given a lift, especially 
repeatedly? I think you know the answer.

Mike Freeman

  ----- Original Message ----- 
  From: Corey Cook
  To: NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List
  Sent: Friday, June 01, 2007 10:38 PM
  Subject: [Blindtlk] question

  Hey all,
  This is Corey Cook.
  I am looking for a little input from some other blind folks.
  As some of you know I am married to a sighted wife.
  We currently live in an apartment complex here in SC that has several 
other
  blind folks here. The reason all of the blind ones are here is because 
we
  all work for the same company.
  I am really good friends with one of the guys I work with and ever 
since we
  moved in here he has been a big help to me and my wife.
     We have also helped him a lot since we have been here. You know 
asking
  him if he wants to go with us to walmart and out and about when we go 
out.
  Lately we have cut back on taking him out a lot because it was getting 
on my
  wife's nerves that he seemed to always be with us when we went 
anywhere.
     I can understand that because it is nice to just have couple time 
now and
  then, but tonight something happened that really kind of got under my 
skin.
  My wife and I had planned to go and see a movie tonight, and my friend 
asked
  if he could ride to the theater with us so he could see a different 
movie
  that was playing at the same time.
     Lets just say that my wife threw a big fit, and got mad that he 
wanted to
  ride with us. I did not see a reason for a fit or any anger, as he did 
not
  want to go to our movie but just wanted a ride so he could see a movie 
also.
     As a blind person I did not think there was anything wrong with 
this as
  we were going to the theater and it cost like 14$ for cab fair, so why 
not
  just let him ride in our car, and both movies were equal in length.
     So I am looking for thoughts, on this. I could have understood if 
he was
  trying to crash our movie but it was just a ride.
     All of a sudden my wife has decided she does not like a person who 
has
  been our friend ever since we moved here, someone who has loaned us 
money,
  when I had not started working yet, someone who is always willing to 
help us
  Corey Cook
  corey_cook at bellsouth.net

  Live Journal
  http://vanguardman.livejournal.com/
  Xanga
  http://www.xanga.com/ciu_nice_guy
  AIM
  goldadore922
  MSN
  romans815 at earthlink.net

  _______________________________________________
  blindtlk mailing list
  blindtlk at nfbnet.org
  http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindtlk
-------------- next part --------------
Corey:

Now you really don't expect us to get in the middle of a husband-wife debate, now do you? (grin)

You say the guy has loaned you money. Has he offered to pay your gas since? Has he offered other assistance? Has he done some things on his own *without* asking you and your wife for transport?

The answers to these questions will go a way toward making a sound judgment. All-too-often, blind people come (wittingly or not) to depend upon sighted folks and seem relatively unaware of how much they are imposing on the sighted "friends".

For me, the bottom line is that if your wife doesn't want to drive him, that should be the end of it. He has no right to expect you to take him to the theater nor have you an obligation to take him there. If you do so out of the goodness of your hearts or as part of a business arrangement, well and good. But look at it this way: if he is truly an independent blind person, how come he didn't get himself down there? Do you hear many sighted persons asking to be given a lift, especially repeatedly? I think you know the answer.

Mike Freeman

----- Original Message -----
From:
mailto:cooklists at bellsouth.net Corey Cook
To:
mailto:blindtlk at nfbnet.org NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List
Sent:
Friday, June 01, 2007 10:38 PM
Subject:
[Blindtlk] question
Hey all,
This is Corey Cook.
I am looking for a little input from some other blind folks.
As some of you know I am married to a sighted wife.
We currently live in an apartment complex here in SC that has several other
blind folks here. The reason all of the blind ones are here is because we
all work for the same company.
I am really good friends with one of the guys I work with and ever since we
moved in here he has been a big help to me and my wife.
   We have also helped him a lot since we have been here. You know asking
him if he wants to go with us to walmart and out and about when we go out.
Lately we have cut back on taking him out a lot because it was getting on my
wife's nerves that he seemed to always be with us when we went anywhere.
   I can understand that because it is nice to just have couple time now and
then, but tonight something happened that really kind of got under my skin.
My wife and I had planned to go and see a movie tonight, and my friend asked
if he could ride to the theater with us so he could see a different movie
that was playing at the same time.
   Lets just say that my wife threw a big fit, and got mad that he wanted to
ride with us. I did not see a reason for a fit or any anger, as he did not
want to go to our movie but just wanted a ride so he could see a movie also.
   As a blind person I did not think there was anything wrong with this as
we were going to the theater and it cost like 14$ for cab fair, so why not
just let him ride in our car, and both movies were equal in length.
   So I am looking for thoughts, on this. I could have understood if he was
trying to crash our movie but it was just a ride.
   All of a sudden my wife has decided she does not like a person who has
been our friend ever since we moved here, someone who has loaned us money,
when I had not started working yet, someone who is always willing to help us
Corey Cook
mailto:corey_cook at bellsouth.net corey_cook at bellsouth.net
Live Journal
http://vanguardman.livejournal.com/ http://vanguardman.livejournal.com/
Xanga
http://www.xanga.com/ciu_nice_guy http://www.xanga.com/ciu_nice_guy
AIM
goldadore922
MSN
mailto:romans815 at earthlink.net romans815 at earthlink.net
_______________________________________________
blindtlk mailing list
mailto:blindtlk at nfbnet.org blindtlk at nfbnet.org
http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindtlk http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindtlk