[Blind-rollers] Total independence

Thu Aug 30 16:11:11 CDT 2007

What do you say is Dangerous?
Then we can go from there.

--Dar
www.mypowermall.com/biz/home/5779
Every Saint has a past
Every Sinner has a future

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Laura Eaves" <leaves1 at carolina.rr.com>
To: "Blind wheelchair users list" <blind-rollers at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, August 30, 2007 1:33 PM
Subject: Re: [Blind-rollers] Total independence

> Yes, the tendency to take the course of least resistance and let people
> around you do the chores as (1) it's easier and quicker for the disabled
> person, and (2) the able-bodied person actually has a hard time watching 
> the
> disabled person try to do something him/herself, partly because it takes
> longer and partly becausae it looks dangerous -- and sometimes it is
> dangerous, depending on the activity.
> But given the proper training and practice and common sense, sometimes 
> what
> looks dangerous to an AB person isn't really so.
>
> Comments?
> --le
>
>
>
>
> ----- Original Message ----- 
> From: "Bettye Reeves" <birdree at yahoo.com>
> To: "Blind wheelchair users list" <blind-rollers at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Thursday, August 30, 2007 11:44 AM
> Subject: Re: [Blind-rollers] Total independence
>
>
> Hi:  This is Birdie, Kassie's mom.  I am eager for her
> to read this and answer, then I might have more to
> add. We have really struggled with these issues, and I
> feel that the longer she lives with us the more
> dependent she becomes, even though it is not what she
> or her Dad and I want.  Many times it is just more
> convenient for us to do something rather than take the
> extra time for her to figure out how to do it. As she
> has written in previous e-mails, she is moving into a
> condo this week, and we have gone  htrough quite a
> process to get to this point. I'll ket her write what
> she wants to on this subject, and then I can fill in
> some from the family's perspective. I also could say a
> little about the mechanics of how we got various
> things authorized. Beleive me, Alabama is not a very
> progressive state when it comes to services, but we
> have gotten through alot of obstacles to set up a
> system that should allow her to live on her on. Best
> regards, Birdie.  P.S. I don't know if Kassie really
> wants me to read her e-mail contributions to this
> list. If she doesn't, I will unsubscribe to honor her
> privacy.  If I do that, rest assured I will remain
> interested in and supportive of this group.--- Laura
> Eaves <leaves1 at carolina.rr.com> wrote:
>
>> Hi Jen --
>> I have been wondering the same thing.  I know a
>> disabled person has to
>> choose his/her battles carefully as there are some
>> things that will always
>> require assistance of some kind, human or electronic
>> or mechanical -- but I
>> think the person has to determine that for
>> him/herself and not have an able
>> bodied person try and dictate what needs to be done,
>> primarily because they
>> can't always imagine what it would be like to be in
>> that situation, or would
>> think that the only solution would be the easiest in
>> their mind.
>>
>> I have been having this little battle with my
>> mother, who who believes that
>> in my current state I ould never be able to be
>> independent again, and she
>> makes some compelling arguments, and I know I depend
>> on her probably
>> over-much.  But on the other hand she refuses to
>> help me become more
>> independent by showing me how to set the dials on
>> the washing machine (she
>> insists on doing all the laundry) and she thinks
>> that because of the
>> wheelchair in addition to my vision, I should never
>> again try to cook.  (But
>> again, when I was young, I had to go away to school
>> and take a cooking class
>> myself to learn to cook, as she always thought I
>> would burn myself on the
>> oven at home...)
>>
>> She always also rminds me of all that needs to be
>> done for me as she indeed
>> does "pick up the slack" as she puts it quite a lot.
>>  I have gotten quite a
>> bit more dependent than I would like to be, but that
>> is a 2-way street.
>>
>> The clincher for me is that there is not a
>> satisfactory plan B in the even
>> she dies (she is a healthy 83, but her health is
>> failing in little ways even
>> now), and I really want to be prepared for anything
>> once she is no longer
>> around. I think at some point, she will cease to be
>> able-bodied and we may
>> both be dependent on outside assistance.  Don't get
>> me wrong -- Mom and I
>> have always been a team, albeit we don't agree on
>> many things -- but back in
>> college I went out of my way to live on my own for 8
>> years, and half of that
>> time I was chair bound.
>> The times I had to hire a live-in aide were the
>> worst.  And that might well
>> be what it will take again as time goes on -- or as
>> Mom is thinking, I
>> should be in a hospital -- which bothers me the
>> most.
>>
>> Anyway, I look forward to hearing your thoughts on
>> the matter.
>> I would like to live at home with roommates and
>> depend on hired assistance
>> if that is possible. We are moving soon and so I
>> have no idea what we will
>> find.
>>
>> Waiting eagerly for your thoughts...
>> Have a good day!
>> --le
>>
>>
>> ----- Original Message ----- 
>> From: "Jennifer Aberdeen" <freespirit328 at gmail.com>
>> To: "Blind wheelchair users list"
>> <blind-rollers at nfbnet.org>
>> Sent: Wednesday, August 29, 2007 9:59 PM
>> Subject: [Blind-rollers] Total independence
>>
>>
>> Hi list,
>>
>> My Grandmother and I were just having a discussion
>> about my mobility
>> expectations being a blind wheelchair user. She
>> doesn't think I could ever
>> be independent being in my situation, and I truly
>> believe that while I may
>> not be able to achieve total independence, I can
>> strive to be as independent
>> as possible. I keep trying to tell her that it can
>> be done if only my
>> mobility instructor would work on a route with me
>> for more than one
>> day...perhaps once or twice a week for a couple
>> months would work. I would
>> like to be able to take a stroll down the street
>> without having someone
>> attached to my hip all the time. I know there are
>> some situations where it
>> would be necessary to have someone with me, but I
>> don't believe I have to
>> submit to a life of dependence. The thought of
>> accepting that makes me very
>> depressed. I thought maybe I would start a
>> discussion about this and hear
>> your thoughts on this topic.
>>
>> Jen
>>
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>>
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>
>
> Bettye K. Reeves, MA, LPC
> birdree at yahoo.com
> 205-792-2898
>
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